Every time I feel down and hopeless, doomed and felt like being chained to the very bottom of the sea, I feel like running away to the farthest place. However there is no such place, is there?
No place in this world that can really give me the utmost serenity. Maybe just not yet. People say Makkah is the best place where one can get that peaceful feeling. How I wish I can go there and purify my soul. But alas, I don't know whether I have that chance of going there or not. Hm.
Running running and running.
Till when do you want to run? There is no destination and the journey is way too long. It's so sickening; having to defy your own will, having to evade your own self and having to portray your twisted alter ego in order to mask everything that goes as bad as hell inside you. It's so obnoxious to be pretending. It is against your own conscience. Broken conscience means broken soul. And broken soul will sully a body. When a body is sullied, there would be no more glitter of it on the surface. Superficially, you look like nothing valuable coz you are dead inside. It's deep rooted and hard to get to but once stained, there's hardly a cure.
You are running on fuel and it will someday run out... when the time comes, you'll die... Die because you cannot run no more, and you are too afraid to face the truth... hence the fear itself would kill you bloody. Why does life have to end such a way?
Que sera sera and there's nothing that can stop your destiny except YOU.
maybe because you have a black heart that you keep stumbled upon the same problem... please be dead soon...