Sunday, January 31, 2016

Big Heart.


I really think that someone who can accept criticism or complaints about himself without feeling even wee sad or emotional is very amazing. Because just imagine, someone came to you and say all these kind of harsh words about you or your personality but yet you can still smile out of it and not take it personally. Instead you can even laugh at your own downfall and joke about it with your friends. But its okay to do this granted that the one doing the complaining is sincerely wanting to change you, not mocking you. 

To me, I cannot handle insulting words very nicely. I will make facial expressions showing how uncomfortable I feel about those words bombarded at me. I really respect those people with ironclad heart who can still make poker face when people insult them. That's simply amazing.

Kai who can still joke about his dark skin even when others are continuously teasing him.

Then again, right on point! He is proud of pointing out his dark skin colour as his ultimate charm. Salute bro!

Qu puteh qu puteh barulah puteh~ (Kai EXO)

Big hearted people are also forgiving. And people who are able to forgive before others ask for forgiveness are the best kind of people!!!!

p/s: Dear Kai, thanks for teaching me how to accept myself inside and outside. Thanks for teaching me to be proud of everything about me. Embrace yourself, the good and the bad. Be original, be YOURSELF!

Monday, January 25, 2016


The fact that how much songs could affect my mental state is really baffling. Huhu. Yeah that's me. Even when I am weird, I am happy this way.

I am that kind of person who loves to associate a song to an incident or event. Sometimes, I would assign a song to a person. Is it weird? Whenever I overhear that particular song emanating from the radio or whenever my friends play the song on the lappy, I would abruptly be taken to remember the person or incident associated to it. And most of the time, my life felt like a montage, complete with the suitable song to perfectly define each moment. That's probably how our brains work, they connect sound with particular things (image, event, person, incident etc) as to help us retrieve those memories when needed. If you had come across the Japanese drama on neuroscience, Mr Brain, you would comprehend this better. Just like they way Nakagawa Masaru associated the sound of piano to the memory of him and his sister spending the night looking at the stars in the night skies, people can also link certain music or sound to painful memory.

Surprisingly, not only sounds or music that can do this, smells work too.

When we were little, we often associated smell with a person, a pet, a home or an incident. That's how much the memories are connected by scents. Foggy memories can simply be sharpened by this stimuli. It is miraculous how scents can trigger even the very oldest memory locked away inside your brain. For example, if you smell the air after the rain, the memory of your mom cooking when you are small can suddenly come to light. That's because when we are little, we tend to latch the incident that happened at that particular moment with the smell that came about at that time. Remember the cartoon Ratatouille when the food critic, Anton Ego was suddenly taken back to his childhood memory of eating his mom's awesome cooking after nibbling on the first bite of the vegetable dish call Ratatouille. But in that case, the taste and smell of food both brought back his memory. 

Just now, went out to eat with friends. Thought of giving them treat, but Kak Mirah overtake dulu hahha. The main reason was that I looked sour in the face so she thought that she was the one who should pay. Hmm at last, the luncheon was on her. Bella and Kak Mirah kept on pestering me into telling them what made me look so moody and so serious. Yeah I must admit even my best friend could sense that gloomy black cloud hovering above my head when we were spending our time last Saturday. She kept ranting so many times about how sad I looked and I always had these moments when I spaced out too much. It's like your body was there but not the soul. I apologized, trying to convince her that that particular demeanor had got nothing to do with her - like at all. Maybe all those overthinking made me pensive and passive that I tend to be oblivious of my surrounding.

Hummm. It seems like when I feel sad, people can easily sense it. It seems like I am so very not good in masking all the feelings inside that those things just came out blatantly radiating from my face. Nevertheless, it feels good when we finally realized that people around us are aware of us, that they could take the hint from our appearances, our mood, our auras. And I am happy to have friends who are like that. They are keen to know about my well-being and would feel weird if I behave the way out of the norm. Yeah usually when with them I would be happy, cheeky, loud, gediks yeah you name it. But recently, I am clouded with too many things in my mind that I ended up being miserable and restless. I talked little and clench all those bad things to myself. 

Maybe after this, need to work for this miserable feeling. Gotta make yourself happier. 

p/s: even when listening to Exo songs doesn't really revive my perkiness. It was a lame attempt of escapism. 

Sunday, January 24, 2016

Kembali ke jalan fitrah.

Fitrah kita menyembah Tuhan yg satu. Fitrah kita menyukai yang cantik dan terlihat indah di mata. Fitrah kita hidup berkawan dan bermasyarakat. Fitrah kita hidup beribadah. Fitrah kita untuk selalu berbuat dose dan rasa hampir putus asa mahu bertaubat. Namun, kita dilarang utk putus harapan dengan rahmat Allah swt. Bertaubat lah setiap kali buat dose. Betullah seperti apa yg dikata. Syurga dunia ini ialah neraka bagi umat Islam sejati yg mengharapkan kebahagiaan abadi di atas sana. 

*rase guilty sangat2 sebab gi minat KPoP. Padahal tahu da video clip kpop stars banyak guna lambang sihir yg nyata. Nauzubillah. Sayang kat iman dalam hati*.

Thursday, January 21, 2016

Life Drama.

Yeah. He knows your aptitude, and the verisimilitude of your readiness, hence keep your magnitude of preparation towards matrimony - unrelentingly, unceasingly - and make sure you always have that proper attitude on life as a whole: wanting to get married not simply because wanting to be like others who tie the knots, but to seek the TRUE love which would stay for a lifetime. 


Jacket is awesome.

Bila boring, kita main photoshop. Hahahaha! (walaupun memang terang lagi bersuluh kekurusan itu suatu penipuan).

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Your sweats will pay off.

Today, I had that sudden hankering over a delicious pack of Camior Almond Beryl's Chocolate. I went to airport just to be disappointed to see there was no Famous Amos stall to be found so I drove angrily to Mydin to grab some Van Houten choco bars off the shelves at candy section to relieve the hunger for some sweet candy. I feel that sudden urge to eat chocolate out of nowhere. It was weird though. And above all, I start liking dark chocolate!! Wawwww!!! Couldn't be more healthier I guess. Teehee.


Favourite quote of the day:

When you find peace with yourself and get in touch with yourself, you will never be affected with negativities. coz negativities cannot touch you anymore once you wrap yourself in the drape of positivities.... (Che Ta, 2016)

~dalam mode finalize thesis~

self hypnotism.

Sunday, January 17, 2016


I know that I am fat but I love to eat. It is okay if you love to eat and you eat a lot of food but as long as you are consistent in jogging or working out. I cannot stop myself from eating too much. One time I ate so much food that I finally become weak in the night. It is sad because my clothes are getting tight and my pants are getting smaller. It is so saddening and saddening. Although I love to watch some SpongeBob SquarePants I am so immature (what????).

masalahnya bile mu hilang dalam 10 minit pun, orang dah susah hati. and tak pasal2 aku jugak yang kene marah. padahal aku tak buat salah apa pun. sekadar tak balas mesej wasap ckp mu xde lagi kat rumah. even when i punye silap sebab tak perasan wasap masuk padahal patutnya hal kecemasan call la jgn wasap. huhu. 

Friday, January 15, 2016


Focus on yourself and improve yourself. Don't care what others say. Don't look too much on other's luck. Focus on making your own luck in life. In Sha Allah you will be successful. Sometimes what happened to you in your life may cause that Domino effects. It's inevitable. But life holds greater meaning than that. Move on and be happy. Try to forgive others so that you will be happy.

Tuesday, January 12, 2016


There are certain kind of people who actually made me wanna retreat to the shell of silence and to the state of being introvert. When we are trying to be nice and talk nicely to others, they retaliate by using harsh words and nasty comments. I just don't understand how mean could people be. I just cannot simply bring myself to forgive them. They keep making me feel horrible about myself and always seek to make things I did to look bad in eyes of others. And they thought the world revolved around them. Screw these people. I really hope they'd just die, the same way I am feeling in my heart every time i heard their poking words. Oh gosh. What am I gonna do? I really wish to permanently eliminate these kind of thugs from my life. Coz the truth is I cannot tolerate those people who didn't treat me the same way I treat them. Coz I believe in the sense of justice coupled with reciprocity.


Monday, January 11, 2016

Sometimes, it hurts.

sometimes, things happened. these are among the things that we cannot avoid. but there are also times when we do appreciate it once we have intelligent discussion with our peers regarding research especially with those of the same microcosm. it's just that people who are not doing research who shouldn't weigh in with all those judgmental notes regarding what we do, nor should they complaint. we love research and will keep doing research. how ironic my life is, labwork was the least of my favourite aspect of scientific study but now I am forever stuck with it, like a permanent glue. And to my surprise, I like it!!! Hehehehe.

Friday, January 08, 2016

Random Madness

Rasa nak menulis dengan gambar pulak. Suka menggila dengan Bitstrips. Bila tengok macam-macam templates, memang boleh customize banyak-banyak situasi. Memang seronok. Dalam pada duk main Bitstrips, rasa macam nak reminisce hal lama pulak. Adui..



so do you, people!

I love BITSTRIPS. It's gleefully addicting.

tIPs BerjiMat

This year is gonna be a rough year. Tight budget, price hike, mounting taxes imposed on the rakyat - everything which can make you go crazy just to make sure your ends meet. So this year, I'm gonna have to restrict my expenses. Maybe need to cut off food budget. And not to mention, deduct budget for shopping also. Use the things you already have. And if you have the uncontrolled urge to shop, go to sleep. Do not waste time browsing online shopping websites. 

1) Jimat bab makanan. Puasa banyak2. Dapat diet dan jimat duet sekaligus. Baju pun tak de lah asyik tak muat sebab naik berat badan. Haaaaa~

2) Kalu rasa nak beli baju baru, try buka wardrobe. Baju yang lama-lama tu amik, trim tepi blah tengah hantar kedai kasi kelim baru. Tukar design. At least baju tu bleh recycle bila alter serba sikit. Tak perlu la nak beli new clothes. 

Sedih lah. Adui. 

p/s: tiba-tiba rasa macam nak cari kerja.

Work it

Today, woke up to a back pain. Then after Subh, we decided to go to the gym to break some sweat. Wise aight? Rather than sleeping at home, better go work out to drop  some weight. It was awesome. The sweat was dripping like curazyyyy. Hahaha. 

Aku paling gemor equipment yang ala-ala basikal tu. Memang ralit kayuh.

okay dah kurus skit lepas senaman iya iyalah. hahahaha~

mellow melodies

where you can reach me.

where you can reach me.